Armegeddon

Hell has just frozen over, the end signs are here, Big Daddy put a windshield on his bike. These are the kind of remarks I've been hearing for that last two days. I don't understand how people can be so flippant about the world ending....How can it be ending? Well...........

I'm overly sensitive and cry easily. So as I ride along thinking about everybody picking on my windshield, I start to cry. The tears in my eyes make it difficult to see. I veer into the oncoming lanes while wiping my tears. The car in the oncoming lane swerves to miss me, thereby hitting a telephone pole. It falls across the lanes of traffic and starts a multi-vehicle pileup. A rig fully loaded with hazardous chemicals plows right into this melee of confusion and spills it's load. This causes the fire department and local police to respond. Upon arriving they call out the hazmat team to contain the spill. Being so close to Luke Air Force Base, homeland security is notified. Naturally, the base goes on high alert. Fighter planes start sweeping the sky. Over in Russia, the satellites spot this flurry of activity. They go on high alert and start circling their planes. This gets noticed by their allies in China and they respond in kind. Of course all this activity spooks the hell outta Japan and Israel. So up go those planes. Iran figures that since all the big players seem to be going defcon 1 they'd better get their shit together before bombs start falling on them. Meanwhile...... Diplomatic relations start trying to contact President Bush about what the hell is going on. Not having any brains to call his own, he decides he'd better call daddy and ask what to do. This causes Papa Bush to mutter to himself, "Oh, shit. What's my dip shit son gonna say stupid in public today?" He remembers that when Junior first started talking, that it freaked out mama Bush so bad her eyes popped and it became a permanent condition. All the while wondering how in the hell of all the swimmers he had, that was the fastest one that created him. He spends the next few hours trying to think of simple words that Junior can understand and pronounce.

The rest of the world now on on extremely high alert and not hearing anything from President Idiot decides his silence is evidence of a preemptve strike and in defense start launhing misslies at each other. This escalates into full blown nuclear war. Armegeddon has arrived. Mankind's day is over..............all because insensitive people picked on my windshield. Big Daddy